Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Because it thought they were playing a game. Why do elephants paint their testicles red? So they can hide in cherry trees. How can you tell when there's an elephant in your fridge? You find footprints in the butter. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open the door and shove it in. How do you get a giraffe in the fridge? Open the door, take the elephant out, shove it in. A man in London wanted 1000 concrete blocks. He called up a labourer in Cornwall and placed his order. The Cornishman put on an extra block, in case one broke on the way, and set off on his long journey, in his truck covered in concrete blocks. When he arrived, he unloaded all 1001 blocks, but the Londoner refused the 1001st block, on the grounds that he hadn't paid for it. He told the Cornishman that he simply had to take it back with him on his truck. Driving back with one lone block made the labourer feel like an idiot, so he pulled over by a railway embankment and threw the block off. What's the loudest noise in the orchard? Cherry picking. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? It thought it was a koala. What's the biggest drawback on the Savannah? The elephant's foreskin. A lion called a meeting on the Savannah, and asked all the animals to come. Which animal didn't turn up? The giraffe; it was still in the fridge. Why did the giraffe die? Three koalas and an elephant landed on the fridge. There was a man and a woman in a train, the man was smoking a pipe and the woman had a noisy little dog. Getting increasingly annoyed by the dog, the man asked the woman to shut the thing up, but she said that it was his pipe making it yap. He didn't want to stop smoking his pipe because he was stressed, so he carried on smoking it. A few hours passed, and the woman shouts "If you don't stop smoking that bloody pipe, I'll throw it out the window!", to which the man replied "Well if you do that, your dog's going out with it" So they sit in silence. Eventually, she reaches out and grabs the pipe, and throws it out the window. The dog soon follows. They dive off the train at the next stop to try and find them, and they see the dog running up the embankment with something hanging out of its mouth...the concrete block! A man needs to cross a crocodile infested river, but there's no bridge. How does he do it? He swims, all the crocodiles were at the meeting.